HiH: Pt 1 Christmas Values

I have signed up to do Jessica Spragues 'Holidays in Hand' Class online (I am now 8 days 'behind' but lets not talk about that). The first assignment is to look at my/our 'holiday values' and come up with some goals related to that, hence this post.

Part one is to define our holiday values; Those things we treasure most, and the hopes we have for ourselves and our families during the holiday season. We were asked to think of some phrases or sentences that describe OUR family's holiday values. What matters most to us. What values do we hope to instill in our family.

We were given a list of words to prompt our ideas which I narrowed down to these;

• peace
• family
• tradition
• togetherness
• magic
• spirit
• laughter
• food
• sweets
• stockings
• lights
• ornaments
• gratitude
• sharing
• merry
• giving
• appreciating
• reflecting
• memorable
• joyful

And we were asked to think of intentions like - "I would like my family to be together more during the holidays." or "I would like to reach out to those less fortunate." When you've got a list of your values - what's important to you - you can move on to creating specific goals from them.

Thinking on this I realise how much of this stuff we already have sorted which is pretty cool.

When we got back from Australia we did have a plan to do turn about between Stockley Family (Te Aroha), Smith Family (Christchurch/Dunedin) and Christmas at home in Auckland. But over time things change... it's an expensive undertaking to head all the way south and we can't really afford it. And heading to Te Aroha isn't a hell of a lot of fun as the family there is quite fragmented and we feel pressured and pulled in lots of directions. We have also struggled with spending Christmas just as a family of 5 though and really feel like a Christmas Day at home is a lot like a glorified Sunday with good food and new toys. We have been really fortunate the last two years to have been able to spend the past two Christmases with the Rae's but that is not possible anymore so we've been considering our options.

Before Christmas day we have various traditions that are really important:

• We always send Christmas cards- it's a really important way of telling our family and friends each year that no matter how much we haven't been in touch they are still important to us. The kids do them for their friends as well.
  
• We always have advent calendars- it's a big part of getting into the spirit and anticipating the cool stuff to come.
• Last year we started a Daily December album traditions which goes a long way to helping us be aware of the season, to reflect on it and capture the memories.
  
• We try and put up our tree and decorate the house on the first weekend in December- I love decorating! The kids have trees for their own rooms as well. We all have balls with our names on the tree.
  
• We always get at least one gift to put under the K-mart Wishing tree. Last year we did pressies for a Mum and Child at the Women's refuge as well.
• I've always lamented the fact that school finishes too close to Christmas this year it's a bit earlier so I am hoping to do some cool stuff with the kids- baking and such.
• We have our annual family photo with the big red dude at the mall.
• Roast Chicken for Christmas Eve.
• And a trip out after dark to check out the local neighbourhood light displays.
  
• Then we set up the video camera and head for bed... Santa moves so fast you can't see him but the presents are static so you see them building up under the tree!

On the big day....

• Ideally we'd like to spend the day with extended family or friends.
• We have various traditional presents, including starting with the stockings on the end of the kids beds.
• We have pared down the amount of 'stuff' that is under the tree over the years as well. We have always told our kids that we have to send the money to Santa for the presents- and we can only send so much so.....
  
• We have various food traditions including a cooked breakfast with french toast on the BBQ. Ham, new potatos, salad, pavlova, fruit punch for lunch and budget allowing shrimp cocktails for starters... leftovers for dinner. :-)
  
• We like a mix of being able to just relax and enjoy the company and our new presents.
• And doing some fun interactive stuff with the kids, outside and in.
• We place calls to parents and grandparents, brothers and sisters.

We also have a DVD day tradition on Boxing day. Chill out day.

So when I look at that list from the first section I can see that the areas we are lacking or missing are gratitude, appreciation, reflection, and family.

Values Become Goals

So from that I would say that over the years we have refined our process down to something that works. My goal is to carry on as per usual with the following add-on's

1. Spend some more time reading together from our collection of Christmas books and looking at Christmas/Family specific scrapbook albums and pages to prompt some reflection and discussion.
2. Allot each of the kids a small sum of money to purchase gifts for the other four members of the family and let them do it of their own accord (except Will of course).
3. Do a few more activities in the lead-up to Christmas to fulfil 3 goals; 1. togetherness, 2. fun 3. reaching out to our community. (Something like the Christmas Wish Scheme we have in Dunedin. Some Christmas cards for the old folks home or some home baking for a resident in the old folks village around the corner).
4. In the long term we need to find a way to spend time with family and friends that works for us all.

I asked Les to complete the same task and unsurprisingly he approached it differently here are the goals he came up with...

I would like my family to be more at peace with each other.
I would like to extend our circle of friends
I would like people to feel welcome when they meet us.
I would like us to build a family spirit, where we all work together to keep us all safe and repel those would wish any harm on any of us.
I would like to hear the sound of laughter (not Merenia’s fake laughing though) more around the house.
Christmas has always meant great food in my life, and I’d like it to continue.
We already have a great life and should savour and appreciate it a bit more.
I would like Christmas to be memorable for my children and wife for all the right reasons.
Christmas is about the giving and not necessarily getting.

♥